Returning to Work
I am writing this the night before I return to work. I got a dream job working with a company that I love. I am honestly more excited to start working there than almost any other job I've ever had. My unemployment lasted almost exactly a month, I know that others have not been so fortunate, but I wanted to share my thoughts on what it is like returning to work after a month off.
The first feeling I have after the excitement is actually sadness. The last month, my son and I have been able to spend some serious quality time together. We got to sing, dance, watch movies, read books, nap, and swim. It's had it's fair share of challenges. A two year old is never reasonable with demands. It's almost as if he knows he's pushing buttons and doing it for sport. Throughout those challenges, I truly enjoyed my time with him. I found that he loved watching Binging with Babish on Youtube . (I highly recommend if you are into cooking at all to check that out) We sat in my sons room, watching these cooking shows and I honestly cherish that memory. I am really going to miss not having plans and just letting the day take us where it will. My little man goes back to daycare this next week and I know that this house will feel empty while he is there.
The other driving feeling here is fear. I wrote earlier about my anxiety about getting laid off, the feeling like I wasn't good enough. As I reenter the workforce, there is that shadow of doubt leaning over my head. I am confident that those feelings will go away as soon as I find my rhythm. I know once I get my feet under me that I will have all of that confidence back, but how long does that take? How can I ensure that it goes by as fast as possible? I know these feelings will subside, but I think it is important to understand them and embrace them.
To summarize, I am so excited to start this job, but I am aware that it will take some adjusting. I've been calling this last month my summer vacation. It's honestly been so fun, but I am aware that the fun I have had has not been the same for others. If you are still looking for your next opportunity, hang in there. If there is any way I can help, please do not hesitate to reach out. I've heard this a lot "We are in this together", but I can say that the community has really come together.